For the next 12 weeks, I’m participating in a health and wellness program, Briding the Wellness Gap, led by Chris Roche who is the owner of my gym, Circle City Strength and Conditioning. He approached me about doing this program so that I could experience it first-hand with the intent to be a BTWG coach in the future. After much consideration (and a good “talk through it” session with my friend, Lori), I agreed. I am excited about what God is going to teach me through this program and how He is going to use it in the future.
So, Chris has encouraged each of us to blog our experience. You may notice that this is actually my second post. I started this blog back in May. However, I became self-conscious about doing it and told myself it was silly and no one would read it. So, I didn’t write anymore posts. Until now. Since I already had this blog set up, I didn’t have any excuses not to keep a blog. Not that Chris would accept any of my excuses anyway!
For this first post, I’ve decided to share part of my BTWG application essay to give you some of my background and goals for the program. Here it is…
“For most of my life, I have had a love-hate relationship with food. I loved to eat. However, it used to end up making me feel gross and bad about myself. In addition, because it caused me to be overweight, I had a bad body image and self esteem. But I couldn’t seem to stop eating these foods that made me feel so bad. Not to mention that I put so much emphasis on food, my weight, and my size. I would look forward to events, not for the event itself or the people that I would share it with, but for the food. I also spent most of my time thinking about my weight and comparing myself to others. I was obsessed…and miserable.
Praise God that He began to change me 2 ½ years ago. I know for certain that it is because of Him that I am free from those chains of obsession of food and obsession over my weight and size. When I first started coming to PR Fitness, I did not have a plan or any goals. I just came because I loved it. I loved the challenge, the people and the way the hard work made me feel. Gradually, I began changing my eating habits because working that hard and fueling my body with junk just didn’t make sense. God started changing my view of food. Food is fuel. As it says in 1 Corinthians 6:19-20, “[my] body is a temple of the Holy Spirit…therefore [I] honor God with [my] body.” I need to take care of it so that I can serve Him by serving those around me. I can’t do that if I’m not fueling my body properly and exercising in order to make it stronger. Not exercising to punish myself or so that I could have dessert. God was transforming my mind like He says in Romans 12:2. “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is – his good, pleasing and perfect will.” I was able to see food and exercise in a whole new way. Years of telling myself all of the foods I CAN’T eat on a “diet” were in the past. I CAN eat anything, but should I? The Bible says in 1 Corinthians 6:12 “’I have the right to do anything,’ you say—but not everything is beneficial. ‘I have the right to do anything’—but I will not be mastered by anything.” God taught me how to make the best decisions when I was hungry. I learned to choose foods that would give me energy and fill me up…protein, good fats, vegetables, fruits. I didn’t want cookies, chips, ice cream, crackers, etc. anymore. Not because I told myself that I COULDN’T have them, but because I knew that they don’t satisfy me. They actually make me feel bad physically and psychologically. The wisdom and the strength to make these decisions came from God, not me.
I have to be careful though. I know that I have to stay on guard to my old ways. I need to stay focused on God and in His Word. Otherwise, I turn my focus to food and what society says about how I should look, eat, etc.* This is where I think I am going to grow the most during BTWG. I need to continue to learn how I am defined by God so that I guard against defining myself by my size or weight. I need to continue to rely on his strength and wisdom to fuel my body properly. I compare it to when Peter got out of the boat and walked on water. When he took his eyes off of Jesus, he began to sink. When I take my focus off of the Lord and focus on food, my size, my weight; I will sink into slavery to those things. Just like the Bible says in 2 Peter 2 19 “ for a man is a slave to whatever has mastered him.” I must not allow food, my size or weight to master me. I must enjoy the freedom that comes from knowing who I am in Christ, having strength and wisdom to make the best decisions for my body and doing everything to bring glory to the Lord.
One of my major goals for the BTWG program is to put words and scripture to my journey so that I can help others when they ask “how did you do it?”. I will be focusing on wellness of the mind and spirit. That seems to be an area for me that I often struggle with when I am tempted to – and sometimes do – focus on my weight and size.”
So, there you have it! Thanks so much for reading. I promise not to wait 10 months this time for my next post!